Saturday, August 28, 2010

Our Story

Hubby and I met 7 years ago (wow, that's hard to believe!) while I was senior in high school and he was waiting for a spot to open for him at boot camp. I'm the classic overachiever and decided my senior year I was going to start taking classes at the local community college, and dear hubby was taking classes to pass the time until he left for basic training.

We dated casually until he left. It wasn't until we were at the place to drop him off that I realized how much I was going to miss him. Over the next few months I stalked the mailman for my once a week letters and wrote to him constantly. I even got a few phone calls thrown in there :) I begged and pleaded with my dad to let me go to his graduation, instead of going to my prom, and after a few phone calls with his parents he relented. It was the most amazing experience ever. To see all those young men and women getting ready to dedicate their lives to the service of our country makes me tear up just thinking about it.

After the graduation weekend we knew we were serious about one another. However; as I was preparing to begin my freshman year of college in Norfolk, VA, he was moving to Pensacola, FL for training. Over that summer and 1,000 phone calls we decided to get married. Yes we talked it through, made lists of the pros and cons ect. Not the most romantic thing in the world but that's just us. Then late that summer my dad had accompanied me to Pensacola for a visit and he officially proposed in the Sonic Drive Up! We have had many laughs over his choice of location when beautiful Pensacola Beach was only a short walk away.

May 28, 2005 I married my best friend and had my first taste of being a military wife. There are no guarantees on them being anywhere at any specific time as the frantic bride found out when he almost missed the rehearsal the night before our wedding. His first deployment shortly followed, but aside from that and other 'typical' Navy separations we had an uneventful first few years of marriage.

Then 2 weeks before I was to receive my Bachelor's degree I found out we were expecting! We were both elated. Our daughter was born August 2, 2008; however, had a series of unexpected complications that caused her to be admitted to a NICU across town where she could get the treatment she needed. This was a very traumatic experience for us both, but I discovered that instead of pulling apart and placing blame we drew closer together and our faith that God was in control and would see us through. She's doing remarkable now. She's still not out of the woods completely but considering that we were initially told if she made it the first three days she would probably live, we feel that each day is a blessing.

Two shorts weeks after her NICU release hubby left for a second deployment, this one much harder because we had a child. Once he got home we left immediately for our next duty station, sunny Florida! We found a great church family, and had a second child, a little boy. With all that settling, plus being able to expect him home at night, we've developed a level of complacency. We're in a good routine and we've relaxed into a rut.

That's where The Husband Project comes in. While we are both in the same rut, I'm the only person whose actions I can control. I can't wait to see where God leads me in this endeavor and what lessons I learn in the process!

As for today I didn't get up until after my amazing husband had left to take our daughter to Gymboree. It was so nice to sleep in a little since Bug has hit a growth spurt and is nursing around the clock. Perhaps it had something to do with my putting in a little more effort the past few days? Instead of lounging in bed though I hopped up and got my hair done, make up applied, and dressed. That's usually more than I accomplish all day and I felt wonderful about myself all day!

Tomorrow my father-in-law, the kiddos, and I are going on a road trip to pick up my mother-in-law from New Orleans while dear hubby stays here to study. I'm planning on going ahead and prepping him some of his favorite snacks and ensuring he has lots of sharp pencils and clean paper to take advantage of his newly organized workspace!

Friday, August 27, 2010

It's Official!!

September 7th is my start date for The Husband Project! Between family coming into town and a preplanned Labor Day holiday I've decided that I'm going to wait until we're back into our normal routine. Plus I need some time to put some thought and effort into my first week of projects. Until then I'm continuing to look for ways to bless my husband on a daily basis.

Going along with that, I've decided to compile a list of books (both Christan and non-Christian) that have inspired me along the way. I'm a bit of a self-help book junkie :)

This is the first 'marriage' book I read once we were married. Great ideas and insights on things we do as women that we don't even realize we're doing. I'm still working on adapting some of these principals in my life.

This book was gifted to my husband and I during our engagement by my wonderful Mother-in-law. Not only does it cover money, but it also covers various aspects of personality and getting along with conflicting personalities. As my soon-to-be husband and I were reading this we just kept nodding because the personality tests included in it pinpointed us so well. Fabulous Christian book for both married and engaged couples.

Another great Christian book on marriage. This one is written all about men and is very soundly researched, there is also a companion book called For Men Only that is written by Shaunti and her husband. There are many different ways you can use this book in your marriage. My husband and I decided to switch so we were each reading the book about our own gender, as we read we highlighted important notes, wrote in the margins and used it to reinforce how we felt so that when we read each others book it was like a personalized book on each other.

While Dr. Laura can be controversial I think she has some great points and insight into what make marriage and family work. I enjoyed both of these books and go back to them when I need a little kick in the pants!

While this isn't a book specifically focused on marriage, most couples that divorce within the first seven years attribute it to money fights and money problems. This is a great no-nonsense book on getting your financial life straight from a Christian, common sense point of view. Including how to work with one another when it comes to money. Hubby and I like Dave Ramsey so much we facilitate his Financial Peace University course at our church.

We read this book together during a pre-marital course on communication we took. Again this is a great book to give insight on one another and how to connect by using the 'love language' of your partner. For me what I found most important was discovering hubby's love language so I can recognize when he is trying to show me that he loves me, even though he isn't speaking my language. For men and women it's kind of like a translation book if you're in a foreign county, because sometimes that's what marriage feels like!

This book I haven't personally read. However; I've seen the movie Fireproof which is based on this book and it brings me to tears every time. Perhaps when I have completed The Husband Project I will take on The Love Dare!

Thursday, August 26, 2010

Day 0

I haven't yet finished reading the chapter on day one, but I still wanted to participate in the challenge Mami put forth to start being 'cute' instead of 'pooped' and decided to take it one step further by finding other ways to bless my husband throughout the day.

Most days I'm busy with the kids from sunup to sundown and I'm lucky if I can grab a quick shower, but today I decided to make myself a priority! The time is there if you're determined. I had Leah in the bathroom with me reading books while I showered and primped and Bug in his swing napping. Leah had a blast helping Mommy!

So, instead of the tired spit uppy T-Shirt and shorts, I transformed into a woman with polished hair and make-up! I even felt better about myself, this is a trend that's going to continue! When my sweet hubby saw me he didn't say anything but the grin on his face was worth 1,000 words!



Aside from transforming myself I decided that I needed to find another area of dear hubby's life that I could change in order to bless him. He's just started going back to class online, and is taking a very heavy load with 4 classes in an 8 week period. He needs somewhere quiet and organized to work on school away from kiddos. While I'm a good housekeeper the area in our office has completely gotten away from me, I"m embarrassed to post the photos, but I promised I would hold myself accountable. I cleaned and organized the desk and office, including shredding 2 garbage bags full of papers and cleaning out / organizing the desk. Whew!


And After!

Ironically enough I heard Dave Ramsey quoting the following scripture passage today while listening to an old podcast of his. I'm am going to focus on becoming the virtuous wife God wants me to be, and that my husband deserves. I know the blessings will come back to me a hundred fold and I can't wait to tell my story!

Proverbs 31: 10-11 says:
      10 Who can find a virtuous wife?
      For her worth is far above rubies.
       11 The heart of her husband safely trusts her;
      So he will have no lack of gain.

The Husband Project

I've been thinking about starting up a serious blog again for quite some time; however, didn't think I had anything to write about that others would like to read. Because really you don't want to hear about dirty diapers or dishes, right?

The inspiration came during a conversation of the Facebook stalkers of Mami's and Papi's Cloth Diaper Store (check them out, they're awesome!), when we started talking about how we were letting ourselves go, and looking pooped when we hit bed instead of cute (and yes, cute can be comfortable!). Mami issued us a challange to look cute for our men for the day, and put some effort in it and thought behind it. I went full steam ahead on that project, right into The Husband Project!

I was introduced to The Husband Project - 21 Days of Loving Your Man On Purpose and with a Plan by Kathi Lipp last year. I bought the book, read it, and put a halfhearted effort into it and totally forgot about it when Bug was born late May. I've decided to bring it back from the depths of my Nook archives and start over; focused, and with my readers to hold me accountable. Please join me, won't you! I would also love to hear about your journey on The Husband Project!!